This time last year…

On mothers day last year I was in one of the worse states I had ever been. Nothing and no one could shift my mood or make me feel better. I stayed in my bed and shut everyone out including my partner and children. That day was one of the key moments in realsing how bad my depression had reached. For me to not want to see to my children was a true sign that something wasnt right. With that[Read more]

Smile, it’s easier.

Friend: “How are you hun?” Me: “I’m alright thanks, you?” …because its easier to just say i’m fine than to explain what I’m really feeling. The best way to describe what depression (for me) feels like: I get easily annoyed and irritated by the slightest turbulence (When I’m at my lowest) I feel nothing. “Meh” and “numb” are the best words for this feeling. I push people away who try to show their support. I can’t think straight, make my[Read more]

Reflecting Reflecting Reflecting

Currently reflecting on my past, present and future. friendships lost or diminished, jobs I have left and opportunities I have missed all because of two things; lack of balance/timing and low self-worth. As much as people like to assume that I am confident within myself and sure of who I am, the truth is, I am not and I do not. I have always lacked the knowledge of finding the right balance when in friendships, finding a healthy work and[Read more]